New Jersey Will Offer Asylum To The First 500,000 Connecticutians

Connecticutters?* Whatever. Not the point.

Here’s the thing: the Supreme Court of Connecticut, which is apparently occupied by three actual human persons and four sub-human rape apologists, recently did this. You probably shouldn’t click that link unless you’re sitting next to someone who’s okay with being punched in the throat.

I’m pretty sure there’s no coming back from this, and that our only option is to burn Connecticut to the ground and start over. New Jersey will give asylum to about half a million refugees. The rest of you will need to go overland to Canada, so Godspeed.

Normally I’m not quite so Old Testament-y in my reactions, but this epic display of human callousness and woman-hating deserves a truly Biblical response.

Those who look back while fleeing will be turned into a pillar of Sperry-brand boat shoes.

*Apparently, they are often called “nutmeggers,” and I’m not even going to touch that.


  1. WOW. there are really no words for this. did she not raise her one index finger that works to communicate her displeasure?
    JESUS CHRIST, PEOPLE. america’s goin’ to shit. or gone. whichever you prefer.


  2. Not to add insult to injury; but this rapist will probably be compensated by the state for the time he served in prison. Of course this is a state which seems poised to elect Linda McMahon (of WWE fame) to national public office.


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