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King of States!

King of States!

  • gramming
  • professionaling
  • snapping
  • mail me, maybe

I'm Michelle. This is my blog. I write about women and fatness, expound upon semi-coherent thoughts I have in the middle of the night, and offer tough love to those in whom I am disappointed; they are legion. I was born in New Jersey and live in Italy, the Jersey of Europe.

Category: Goings-On

He’s a motivated self-starter with impressive farting skills.

Now that we’ve signed a lease on our new San Francisco apartment (!!!), I can share with you this most … More

Dogs, He also has advanced napping and foot-licking skills, San Francisco

Fatty McFat Fat

Which one of these seems like the better choice? Option A: You have a great job, a great relationship, are … More

Children, Fat, Hey kid I may be fat but at least middle school is behind me

And the microphone smells like a beer.

Tonight, we saw Billy Joel perform — his 20th sold-out show in a row — at Madison Square Garden. Itzhak … More

And my heart grew three shades whiter today, Billy Joel, Music

When good things happen to bad people.

I’m working at my new afternoon coffee shop working spot, which makes a mean iced latte. But I think I’m … More

Beach, Down the Shore, This is the life we chose.

We don’t do things by half-measures in the King of States.

Maybe we don’t want to live in Amsterdam right now, but we’re still hankering for a change. I am therefore … More

Asbury Park, Bruuuuuuuce

If at first you don’t succeed, move back to New Jersey and regroup.

So, remember that time we wanted to move to Italy but it’s a bureaucratic nightmare, so we thought why not … More

AARGH, Amsterdam, new jersey

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