No, really. They sail their fishing boat out to some big ol’ icebergs, and they shoot at the icebergs with…
This is why you should keep a small notebook by the bed.
Actual sentence I said during an impromptu 5AM conversation about hats: “You’re really doing a lot of mental gymnastics to…
Where are Nicholas Cage and John Travolta? I DEMAND A REFUND.
So, this is an actual thing that Bloomberg’s Businessweek felt it necessary to publish: Which business school has the most…
Joe Biden: America’s Happy Warrior
Other options rejected by Obama speechwriters: America’s Drunk Uncle Scranton’s Slightly-Above-Average Son Putterer-in-Chief The Grinner Delaware’s Deliverer America’s Shittiest Ninja…
We Will Never Be Able To Look Posiedon In the Eye Again
The New York City marathon has been cancelled this weekend, which I’m sure is a terrible inconvenience for many runners,…
Too soon?
Tweet that I posted during a brief interlude of cell service on Monday night, immediately regretted, attempted to delete unsuccessfully,…
King of States! 