A Moment of Silence, Please…

… to mark the passing of satire as a thing we can do anymore.  I don’t know exactly who’s to blame here, so I’ll just go with the obvious go-to culprit when things have been destroyed, millennials.

I’m not suggesting that avocados destroy one’s ability to correctly identify and poke fun at human folly, but I’m not not suggesting it. STOP SNAPCHATTING* AND GET YOUR DOGS SOME RABIES SHOTS AND BUY A DAMN HOUSE ALREADY, MILLENNIAL SCAPEGOATS**.

Seriously, though: society, we really need to get our shit together. We can start with group interventions for everyone in Brooklyn and San Francisco.

*Is Snapchat still A Thing? Hello, how are you, I am old.

**Maybe if you pool your money, you can buy one house for all y’all? It’d be hard to share the fridge, but it might get the Boomers off your backs for a couple weeks.

8 Comments

  1. I’m more worried about what is referred to as “satire.” All those fake news sites before the US election (before “fake news” became a fake thing — I can’t believe I have to clarify “real fake news”), they later claimed to be satire. Umm, no. Satire is funny and not simply lies.

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  2. “Say it once more for the people in the back”. Some criticism on idiocracy in the internet is well needed from time to time. Its not hard to get on NPR and pull up some statistics that show autism is not related to a booster shot.

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  3. Avocados kept me in fear of saying anything to anyone . . . until I found an avocado peeler in my kitchen drawer. I have no idea how it got there, but you know what they say: the only thing that can stop a bad avocado is a good guy with an avocado peeler.

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