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King of States!

King of States!

  • gramming
  • professionaling
  • snapping
  • mail me, maybe

I'm Michelle. This is my blog. I write about women and fatness, expound upon semi-coherent thoughts I have in the middle of the night, and offer tough love to those in whom I am disappointed; they are legion. I was born in New Jersey and live in Italy, the Jersey of Europe.

Tag: candy

Someone Should Alert Mayor Bloomberg

I ran into a drug store earlier today to procure some flesh-colored* adhesive bandages, new passport photos, and a bottle … More

candy, Chocolate Bars, Halloween, If You Froze It You Could Totally Use It To Bludgeon Intruders

An Open Letter

Dear White Chocolate, You know you’re not fooling anyone with the whole “I’m chocolate!” thing, right? You could probably put … More

candy, chocolate, I should really just go right back to bed when I wake up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom
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