Candy Corn: What Gives?

Of all the things you could choose to put in your mouth and savor… what horrible thing happened to you, such that you were driven to think, “Yes, candy corn! That’s what I want to eat!” Especially in a world in which gummi cola bottles exist. Whatever it was, it must have been really bad.

I really want to know. Please, someone explain candy corn, and help me sleep through the night once more.

28 Comments

  1. im pretty confident that Candy Corn’s method of releasing itself for one-two months a year is the key to it’s success. its more the tradition than actually liking it… except when it comes to my girlfriend, who LOVES candy corn, and i just dont get it… i always forget how much i dislike it until i try it again.. every year… over and over again…

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  2. There is no explanation! Candy Corn is, has always been, and will continue to be crap! Yellow and Orange don’t go together–never have, never will, not even in the 60s!  Somehow every sentence calls for an “!”.

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  3. It’s not that it’s good, it’s that it’s tradition. See also: turkey, fruit cake, Peeps, and that kind of stale popcorn that comes three “flavors” to a giant tub.

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  4. Here is the thing, though: Starburst Candy Corn? Is potentially the best candy ever. It’s candy corn shaped, but Starburst flavored!

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  5. I know one thing. Money Murder & Mystery 30 years ago Helen Brach candy heiress snuffed by handsome gigolo. Kandy Korn Karma. Sleep tight.

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  6. It’s true candy corn isn’t the best candy. It’s so bad that crafters have started using them as decoration and vase fillers rather than treats. Another candy I don’t get is the Cadburry Egg… BLEH

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