Okay, yes, you want to exercise your not-at-all-made-in-the-context-of-patriarchy choice to wear stiletto heels because they make you feel powerful and you like the way your ass looks? Fine, I’m not going to stop you, although I will help you pick out a nice pair of Birkenstocks if you decide to come to the dark side. But you’ve gotta throw me a fucking bone, y’know?
Because this? Is not even PRETENDING to be a shoe. Maybe it’s an S&M thing. Maybe it’s a torture device. Possibly it’s a polio brace. Maybe it’s all three; it’s almost certainly a heinous amount of money, money that you could spend on a hundred pairs of Birkenstocks or a hefty donation to Planned Parenthood, which needs your hard-earned dollars way more than Tom Ford does.
Really, although I could use a new pair of clogs, I would prefer that you take your money and set it on fire rather than use it to buy these shoes. Sorry, “shoes.”