Finishing Butters, brilliant! Because now the door is open for Starting Butters and Halfway Through Butters and all kinds of In-Progress Butters. Endless possibility! A Butter for every occasion Truly, Paula Deen is the marketing genius of our age. Or possibly our society’s fatal flaw. Personally, I’m looking forward to the Butter-Flavored Butter (Now with Extra Butter).
Forty acres and a stick of specialty butter: the American dream.
King of States! 
Lol. Slather some of that shit on my forehead after my heart attack kills me before you close the door on my body at the morgue please.
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Forehead Butter isn’t scheduled to be released until October, so you’ll need to hang on.
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Don’t forget butterballs! Everyone loves a butterball.
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I’m sure Butterball Butter will be a big hit in November.
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I was thinking even before I opened this post that I love this blog because your posts are so sensibly bite-sized. You are the amuse-bouche of blogs.
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I’ve always liked to think of myself as the digestif of blogs, but I’ll take it.
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Just in case some poor soul makes it here and doesn’t notice one of the greatest use of tags in the history of tags: “POSSIBLY ALSO SHE IS A ROBOT WHICH WOULD EXPLAIN WHY SHE’S NOT DEAD YET”.
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Thank you for noticing my favorite part. My best guess is some kind of flexible armature covered in Finishing Butter, which is then sculpted into the face we all know as “Paula.”
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That woman’s voice sets my teeth on edge. Can I have butter with that?
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Sure, and mayo!
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Too bad they didn’t have some sort of Tex-Mex Zesty butter for those tacos you had the other day.
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You mean, too bad they didn’t have it YET. They will. Oh yes, they will.
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And desert butters, available in a rainbow of colors, or in a rainbow, you know, to give Westboro Baptist a partially hydrogenated excuse for the next natural disaster.
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Diabutter!
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Diabuttical.
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