To Hell In a Handbasket

Someone Should Alert Mayor Bloomberg

I ran into a drug store earlier today to procure some flesh-colored* adhesive bandages, new passport photos, and a bottle of Arnold Palmer. While walking down the Halloween candy aisle, I saw the newest offering from Snickers, the “Slice and Share Snickers.” It costs $12 and weighs a full pound.

Next to it was the world’s largest Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup, also weighing in at a full pound. I note with interest that the Reese’s packaging did not indicate that the megacup was to be sliced and shared. Thus, I can only assume it is meant to be consumed by one person in a single sitting, probably while sitting in a dark room and crying.

They might want to list that serving suggestion on the wrapper, to make sure purchasers understand that it is NOT APPROPRIATE to eat a one-pound peanut butter cup (1) in public or (2) without hating yourself.

For Christ’s sake, candy people: yes, we all have free will, but YOU ARE NOT HELPING.

*Ha.

Standard

7 thoughts on “Someone Should Alert Mayor Bloomberg

  1. “Thus, I can only assume it is meant to be consumed by one person in a single sitting, probably while sitting in a dark room and crying.” — Hey, quit knocking my habits.

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